4 Steps Toward Self Love

When I get a call on my iPhone, my MacBook automatically pops up FaceTime. Today I didn’t even notice it. I pace a lot while I am on the phone, so I wasn’t sitting in front of the phone when it happened. When I returned to my desk I saw myself staring back at me. I smiled at myself and said, “I love you”. Then the me in the computer returned the sentiment. I turned off FaceTime and went back to work. Louis L Hay has talked about the importance of truly loving your self. How comfortable are you looking in the mirror and saying, “I love you” to yourself?

Love doesn’t happen overnight. Just like with any relationship, we need to first get to know the person. Do you know yourself well? Sometimes we think so. Maybe while trying to be the person everyone has told us to be; we forgot to be who we really are. I suggest this as your first step in loving yourself. Spend some time really understand who you are and what motivates you.

Once you know yourself a little bit better, it’s time to come to grips with who you are. What are the things you do not like about yourself? Can you see how they may be a positive thing when you look at them differently? Look at little children. Those things that make them hard for their parents to deal with; are likely the same thing that will make them a successful adult. Questioning, stubbornness, and high energy levels are a few of the many things that can turn into assets in adulthood. Let’s look at someone who is stubborn. It we reframe that as never giving up or tenaciousness, we can see how it could be beneficial. Take a peek at the things you don’t like about yourself and see if you can change how you look at them. Feel free to comment or email me if you can’t find the good and maybe I can help you shift that perspective.

So you have gotten to know yourself better and shifted some of your negative thinking. Now spend time with yourself. Many of us have trouble with this. We get a little alone time; so we call someone, send a text, or get busy doing something. Anything rather than just hanging out by our self. Spending some peaceful time with; me, myself and I, is a great way to gain a deeper understanding of who you are. Things will come up. They maybe things that have lay hidden for a very long time. Pushed down deep and hidden under busyness. Allow them to surface so you can either heal them or accept them as part of you. Remember that you are perfect just as you are.

Finally we come to the big moment. It is time to say it. Look in the mirror. Make eye contact with yourself and say , “I love you”. This may be difficult at first but that’s true in many relationships. Love make us feel vulnerable. What if we let ourselves down? I bet you can forgive yourself. This is a huge favor you can do for yourself. Forgive yourself often!

I hope you walk through these steps. Skip any that you don’t think you need but be willing to revisit them later. We are always changing and evolving and so should your relationship with yourself.

Thank you for reading my blog today. I love you! May you love yourself too, as if by magic.

*Photo was taken at Magic Kingdom in Orlando FL. I felt it represented several aspects of ourselves, inner child, happy self and never satisfied self. Even the subconscious is lurking in the background, as are many others.

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