7 Reasons to Smile is

1 It makes others feel good when you smile at them. Have you ever had a stranger smile at you. It’s just a nice feeling.

2 It makes you feel good to smile too. It helps your body release those feel good hormones.

3 Fake it, till you make it – when you smile (even when you do not feel like it) it helps to elevate your mood.

4 One smile can lead to many more – when you smile at someone, then they smile and the next person and so on. So that one smile can become blossom into many smiles very quickly!

5 It connects us. Walking down the street and you catch someone’s eyes and smile and for the briefest of moments, the two of you are connected, even if you never see them again.

6 It raises your vibration! The higher your vibration, the better you feel but not just you, those around you will feel the difference too.

7 You look nice when you smile. Think about someone making a grumpy face vs. a happy face… who do you feel more drawn to? The smile of course!

Keep smiling friends! Thank you for reading my blog today! I wish you a lifetime of reason to smile.

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Speak from the Heart

Have you heard of the Chakras? How you can use these ancient energy centers to help your message, be not only heard but also felt? This simple technique can help you send the purest intentions to those you are communicating with.

The Chakras are energy centers within the body. There are 7 of them. They start at the base of the spine and move to the top of the head. Some traditions even teach of an 8th center above the head. They are all represented by different colors. The colors of a couple of them vary, a little, depending on the tradition in which you learned of them. I first learned about the Chakras when I was trained in Reiki Energy Healing. So, starting at the base of the spine, I will list the Chakras for you. At the bottom of the spine is the Base Chakra. It is represented by the color red and is related to safety and security. In the lower abdomen is the Sacral Chakra, which is represented by the color orange. It affects passion, creativity, and sexuality. Next we have the Solar Plexus Chakra. Yellow is its color and it has to do with self-esteem and personal power. As we move up to mid-chest we have the Heart Chakra. It is green and rules the emotions. In the neck is the Throat Chakra. It has to do with your voice and making yourself heard. It is blue. Between the eyebrows is the third eye or Brow Chakra. It is purple. (in my Reiki tradition but Indigo in other traditions) It has to do with interpreting information and intuition. At the top of the head is the Crown. It can be represented by clear or by the color purple. It has to do with your spiritual connection.

Now that you know a little about the Chakras; I feel I should be encouraging you to speak from the Throat? It is true that our Throat Chakra helps us be heard and it is an important part of the equation. If you speak from the Heart your words will be stronger, more meaningful, and spoken with the purest of intent. It is easy to see how this might make sense in a speech about an emotional topic, like children, or healthcare. But there may be a topic that just doesn’t seem like it has room for emotions. Let’s say you are giving a speech on accounting. This may seem to be a very cut and dry type of speech, about numbers and procedures. There doesn’t seem to be room for emotions in this speech. If you speak from the Heart, however, your truest intentions will come through. Those hearing your speech will also feel your intention to help them or call them into action.

So how do you speak from the Heart? I feel visualization is a powerful tool to use. Picture the words coming down through your Throat and projecting out of your Chest, right through the green revolving energy center there. See your words entering the audience in the same place. A Heart to Heart connection. Feel the warmth of your words spreading throughout their being with the best intentions to help them. Practice it and watch the difference in how people respond to you when they not only hear your words but also feel your words.

Speaking from the Heart can be a powerful tool to help you make you message known and get your intentions communicated. Using this simple visualization, you could find that you are more easily able to affect not only those around you but also the world.

May your life be full of communication, that is not only heard, but also (having those good intentions) felt. Thank you for reading my blog today. I love you!

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Control?

Have you heard that control is just an illusion? This is true. There is so much in this life that we cannot control but what do we really have control over? We only really have control over ourselves and how we react to things.

The only thing you sometimes have control over is perspective. You don’t have control over your situation. But you have a choice about how you view it. ~ Chris Pine

We all have choices in life, this is true, but we cannot control the outcomes of those choices. However, we can work on our perspective about the things that happen around us. You can look for the disappointment and sorrow in a situation or you can look for the silver lining. This is the most powerful thing you can do to control your life.

You cannot change others but you can change how you react to others. If you are trying to change something or someone you are probably feel very frustrated, because we really do not have that power. We can try and force others to change but in the end the change will likely not be sustainable. If they are just making changes because we are trying to force that upon them, eventually they are likely to slip back into being who they are. I am not saying people can’t change. People can and do change. I have changed a great deal over my lifetime. But none of the change was because someone else made me. All of the change started within myself. There was a time in my life when I was going through huge transformation. It started by a stirring deep down within me. It drove me forward and I started pushing to know more about this. I started studying, reading books, taking classes, and joining discussion groups. And I did change. I changed a great deal. I changed so much that the me, I was before this all started to happen, would not recognize who I am today. The point is, I changed but not because someone wanted me to, it was organic and it came from within me.

I once had this one particular friend. We started working together and things quickly went bad. She started gossiping about me. Because of this the way other people treated me changed and they would stop talking when I came around the corner. I couldn’t control her or her behavior, nor could I control the way others responded to her gossip. What I could control (and did) was how I reacted to it. I got another job within the company at a different location. It was actually a promotion for me, so her bad behavior was a blessing in disguise. Because we were still within the same company, those same people could see that I was being quite successful and doing a great job, so their opinion of me started to shift again to the positive. I took control of what I could control. ME!

The Problem is not your problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem ~Captain Jack Sparrow

With a positive outlook, good attitude and remembering that situations (and people) will happen, but that you can only control your response to them, life will feel a little less out of control.

Thank you fo reading my blog today. May life always help you move forward in positive ways.

The Power of Forest Bathing

It was my husband who first introduced me to the term forest bathing. The terminology brings to mind a stainless steel horse trough sitting out in the woods full of warm sparkling water while a naked being sits happily with arms on the side of the tub and head tipped back enjoying the peaceful bath and surroundings. As lovely as that sounds, that is not what forest bathing is. Forest bathing is a term that started in Japan in the 1980. It is about being in the forests. Walking or resting amidst the trees. Allowing the healing power of nature to improve your health.

I fully understand the power of nature to lighten your spirt, raise your vibration, and make the world seem a little bit brighter. Living in a northern climate, were winter lasts half the year, I miss the call of the dirt path through the trees. I miss walking between the trunks great and small, having the branches of the shrubs brush against my body as I journey on, feeling the filtered sunlight on my face. In the spring the forest smells like dirt and the occasional blossom. In the summer I think it smells like life itself. Everything is boldly green and in its fullest, happiest stage of life. In the fall, the smell becomes that of ripe fruit and the leaves decomposing and returning to the earth. Winter has a crisp clean smell in the forest. The frozen crystalline world has the smell of a fresh start. The sounds change with the seasons also, bird songs and animals scurrying in the brush, give way to the crunch of leaves underfoot and the cracking of ice on branches. Whatever the season that you decide to visit the forest many magical gifts await you there.

There is power there, for you amongst the mighty giants and new saplings. The life force energy that runs through the trees can renew you. It can renew you. It can help you improve your health, fight off illness, and sleep better at night.

We had an especially long and cold winter this year, with piles of snow that seem they will never go away. My husband and I journeyed to Washington State. This gave us a break from the winter weather and allowed us to get out and do some spring forest bathing. We hiked among the mighty trunks of giant Pacific Northwest trees. They seemed to reach up to the heavens. I could breath again. Suddenly all the stress of life and the rushing here and there just melted away. All that mattered was the forest full of new and fresh growth and our companionship as we journeyed through the forest. It felt like a fresh start. It was a healing journey.

There is power and magic in the forest and if you take time to listen, the trees will speak to you. They will share their ancient wisdom. They will teach you how to heal yourself and to care for your neighbor. I strongly encourage you to get out there and take a forest bath.

Thank you for Reading my blog today! I wish you a lifetime of happy, peaceful time in Nature. I love you.

God Dimes?

Have you heard of the idea of God Dimes? I had a friend tell me that angels leave you pennies but God leaves you dimes. So when you are going about your day and you look down and see a dime, it is a sign you are on your right path. You are not alone. It is going to be okay.

Whether you believe in God as a grey haired old man, Creator, Hindu Supreme God, the energy of the Collective Consciousness, Mother Nature, Allah, your Higher Self, or some other incarnation of God – it does not matter. Dimes are a positive sign of being on your correct path.

Yesterday was a hectic day for me. My first flight had an hour delay for a maintenance issue. My connecting flight was cancelled all together. I had the choice to wait 12 hours for the connecting flight I was rebooked on or rent a car and drive the last 3 hours of the trip to my destination. I chose to rent the car and drive so I didn’t totally loose a whole day of work. I was feeling anxious about the lost time, that I had planned to be able to give to the site, I was visiting. Not to mention, things I wanted to accomplish on a personal level that I am working on. I made the changes, booked a car and canceled the flight. When I got into the car there was a dime in the cup holder. What a nice little reminder that everything is working out just as it should be. As I got my phone synced up with the car, I remembered that a friend had recommended an audiobook to me the day before. I downloaded it to my phone to listen as I made the 3 hour drive. It was exactly what I needed to hear.

While I was working in my hotel room last night, my mind flashed to the three book proposals that Emy and I just submitted to Hay House. We are anxiously awaiting to hear that they have been accepted for publication. We feel that the journey of becoming published authors has been Divinely guided. Both of our grandmothers were huge influences in our lives. They both passed away over the last couple of years and we have felt the push of our ancestors to continue working tirelessly toward this goal. We stay intentional about keeping our thoughts positive in order to be accepted as the next Hay House authors. We know that our books have messages that will help many people. As the books came into my mind last night, I looked at the corner of the bed and there lay 2 dimes. A sense of peace came over me.

Sometimes a little sign is just what we need to know it will all be okay. Seeing a little silver dime laying on the street can be a sweet reminder that we are not alone. That we are on our right path.

Thank you for reading my blog today. May your day be full of signs that you are heading in an ever positive direction. I love you!

I Wanna Help!

I am involved in a lot of stuff. I mean really, a lot of stuff! I work hard and I play just as hard. At work, home, and with various things I am involved in, I find myself volunteering or being ask to volunteer to take on more and more. I find it difficult to say, “no”. I wanna help and I want to make my corner of the world a better place.

That is why Emy and I wrote the 3 books. Yes, we have both felt the call to write since we were young girls. I have always know that somehow, in someway, I would eventually be an author. But, Lessons Through Joy, Lessons Through Forgiveness, and Lessons Through Magic were written with a genuine desire to help others. It is a part of the calling to make the world a better place. That same desire, swirling inside my soul, is what drives me to write this blog. It is what pushes me to get something posted 3-5 times a week. I want to help people. I want to make the world a better place.

That same desire is why I go speak to high school students and share my story of placing a child for adoption. I want to share with them an option. When I was young and not prepared to support and raise this child, that was growing inside of me, I had to make/find my own options. By sharing my story, hopefully I can help some other teen see there are other ways to give your child a good life.

My desire to help is why I am the administrator for my local Buy Nothing group. Have you heard of Buy Nothing? It is a movement to keep items out of the landfills and build community by neighbor giving to neighbor. When I first heard of this, I thought the concept was brilliant. Sadly, my neighborhood didn’t have a group. This bothered me; it was simply not acceptable. So I contacted Buy Nothing and offered to be the administrator for my area. It is one more way I can help make my little corner of the world a better place.

I do it at work too. When I see something that needs to be worked on, I often volunteer for the project. I want the company I work for to be a better place also. I want to help things be smooth and easy for others who work there. It is one more way I try and make the world a better place.

I joined Toastmasters last fall to try and make myself a better speaker but I found it was a place I could share important messages also. I try to write speeches for my little group that can help them or that they can share with others. Important messages about loving yourself as is and how forgiveness can improve your life.

I couldn’t take care of the world around me without taking care of my friends and family. So I try to be available as a shoulder to cry on, ear to listen, helping hand when needed. My husband and I worked hard to renovate our own home and now a home for our daughters. We are also using this work to providing encouragement and lessons on being the best version of himself to our teenage son. We want to make the world a better place by helping him grow into the kind of man who will stop and pick up litter on the street, help an elderly neighbor shovel snow or haul in groceries, smile at strangers, and give without selfishness. We spend hours with our grandchildren, helping them to also grow into caring people and build lasting memories for both them and us of play, creativity, and love.

With all of these efforts (and more not mentioned here) to help the world around me, it is easy to get bogged down and feel pressured and feel like I do not have enough time for me. Somehow, I manage. I do feel badly when I have to turn down a request or a project either at work or through some other avenue, but if I do not take a minute here or there for myself, I will be tapped out and not able to continue to give the best of myself. Half an effort is not good enough for me. If I am going to take something on, I need to know I can always give it the best of myself.

Thank you for reading my blog today. May you have healthy happy boundaries.

6 Ways To Help Others Improve Their Wellness

Wellness is important for all of us. We are responsible for our own wellness but we can also support those around us with their journey to be better. Here are some ideas on ways you can help your loved ones work toward optimal wellness.

Tell them positive things about themselves. Many of us struggle with low self esteem and even if we don’t, compliments always feel good. When giving praise, remember that specifics matter. Instead of saying “nice job cleaning the house” try “the stove just sparkles, you did such a great job cleaning the house”.
Encouragement! We all have moments when we do not feel we are doing our best or despite our best efforts, things do not work out the way we would have liked. Having a friend or loved on tell you that you are doing good can sometime make all the difference between feeling discouraged or finding the gumption to keep going.
Don’t enable. Enabling always seems to happen with the best intentions. You feel tired and don’t want to go to the health club, then your well meaning friend tells you it’s okay to take the night off. It gives you the excuse you needed to not go. Think about that family member who always tells you one cookie won’t hurt your diet. If your loved one is working towards a goal, help them keep moving toward that direction. Sometime when their strength is weak, they need you to be strong.
Don’t be the drill sergeant either. A little encouragement can go a long way but ultimately we all get to make our own choices and if we decide that this is not going to be the week we give up caffeine, having a friend try and tell us what to do, will likely not be helpful. Most of us do not like to be bossed around. Going back to the idea of encouragement; let them make their own choices and just be there with reasons and encouragement why they can be successful making healthy choices.
Tell children only good things about themselves. Did you see the movie The Help? In that movies she tells the children, “You is kind, you is smart, you is important”. She said she learned she could help children have good self esteem by telling them that. Bruce Lipton says that research has shown that children, prior to age 7, are in a form of hypnotic trace when it comes to their self esteem. Everything you tell them, they take in like it is the truth. So only tell them the good things about themselves. Remember it is okay to dislike a behavior while you still love and approve of the child.
Smile! When you smile, others feel like smiling too. Nothing can help you feel so good as smiling faces. spread joy!

Because of your smile, you make life more beautiful. ~Thich Nat Hanh

Thank you for reading my blog today. I wish you a lifetime full of wellness for yourself and those who make you smile.

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Self Care: a series – part 3

In part 1: we talked about healthy boundaries. Part 2: encouraged you to take time for yourself. Now let’s discuss self talk. Self talk is simply the things you tell yourself. Some of the things we say to ourselves are worse than anything you would ever tell another human. Even people we really don’t like, we would seldom talk to the way we talk to ourselves, at times. We give ourselves messages about our ambitions, our intelligence, and the way we look. Why are we so hard on ourselves and how can we change it for the better?

When you look in the mirror what do you say to yourself? I know I used to look and see a fat, very plain looking woman. I would tell that woman how discussing she was. I would be angry with her for how much weight she carried and let her know I thought she was a fat pig. These are things I would have never said to another human being. Thanks to Louis L Hay and other teachers like her, I began to recognize that this was not a way to treat or talk to myself. Louis was a big advocate for “mirror work”; looking in the mirror and telling yourself. you love yourself. “I love you Stacy”. It may feel uncomfortable at first, but it is a great first step to start shifting how you talk to yourself.

The next thing you need to start doing is noticing the negative self talk. Once you began to notice how you talk to yourself, you can start to shift it from negative to positive. Notice what you say, think about it, would you ever say this to someone else? Does it pass through the four gates of communication? “Is it kind?” “Is it truthful?” “Is it non- harmful?” “Is now the right time?” I am not sure who to credit with the four gates of communication but we need to apply them to self talk, as well as talking to others. When you say something to yourself like, “you are a lazy”, think about; is it kind? Nope. Is it truthful? If you examine it you will likely find that it is not. You may be depressed, busy, choosing other things to do with your time at that moment, but not really lazy. Is this statement harm free? Can’t pass through this gate either. Negative self talk hurts our self esteem and self worth. There is a lot of harm caused by saying mean things to ourself. As for the final gate, “is it the right time?” , there is never a right time to be mean to ourselves.

As you examine the things you say to yourself, if it can’t pass through even one of these gates, it is time to send yourself a positive message.

It is time to start shifting what we say to ourselves. Start to praise yourself for the things you are doing. Start to notice things to love about yourself. Tell yourself you are proud of you for how hard you’ve worked on a project. Start to notice your attributes, you are a great artist or provide loving care for someone. Begin to tell yourself loving things about how you look. You have great legs. Your nose is really cute. People are drawn to your smile. Every time you notice yourself saying something negative to you, replace it with 2 positive messages. Make a list of all of your skills, positive attributes, and loving kindnesses you share. By making that list you will accomplish two things. Firsts you will see all of the really great things about yourself. If you get stuck, ask friends and family. They will easily and quickly share nice things about you with you. The second thing is that once you have noticed these things and written them down, they will be available for you to pull on to quickly replace the negative self talk. The list will grow and you will replace the way you talk to yourself with loving kindness.

Thank you for reading my blog today.

I wish you a life full of loving kindness, from yourself and others.

Self Care: a series – part 1

As busy people, we often become overwhelmed and feel we do not have time to give to ourself. It is easy to put everyone else’s needs first. Doing things to care for ourselves begins to feel like “luxuries” that we do not think we deserve. After all, all of that other stuff has to get done. Doing something for ourself or taking time for ourself is not necessary. Or is it? Self-care plays an integral role in wellness and is not a luxury. If we do not take care of ourself, we will be there to take care of others.
I have spent much of my life as a director of hospice programs. I asked about self care in interviews, we talked about it in team meetings, and I preached it one on one with my team. Hospice is a job that demands a lot of those called to its vocation. If my team didn’t take care of themselves, they would not have had the stamina to provide our patients and families what they needed as they went through their journey. Having healthy boundaries is a part of that self care. It is import, as a person, to know when to say no or to help someone find another resource to accomplish their need. One of our hospice families may have needed someone to take a dog to the vet. It was important that our team conserved their time and energy for the things only they could do, care for our patient. We would look for a volunteer, family member, or friend who could help get Sparky to his doggy doctor. It is the same in our everyday lives. There are times that people may ask us to help with something and it is wonderful to help people. It gives you a good feeling, that grows in your heart, when you can give someone a hand. When you love someone, you are concerned for their well being and want to make sure their needs are met. The Karma from helping others is really beneficial to us as well. However, if we are trying to meet everyones needs, we will be too drained to do something else that needs to be done. Something that maybe only you can do. Perhaps we are not the best person to help either. Someone else may have better skills to help get that job done than we do.
As you are being pulled in lots of different directions, remember that it is okay to say “no” sometimes. Remember that protecting your boundaries is an important part of self care. If you don’t take care of yourself, who will?

Thank you for reading my blog today. Take care of yourselves, my friends. I wish you a life of healthy boundaries.

Duality – now you see it now you don’t

Opposites attract we have heard. This is certainly true with the ends of a magnetic while those that are the same push apart. Have you ever spent much time thinking about duality?

Marty and I went dog sledding on Thursday and then flew to Florida for a long weekend. From 7 to 87. Talk about duality! One day I am sledding through the snow and the next walking on the beach. Both are nature, both have a form of water, but the similarities end there. The forest was full of trees the sun was out but the air remained cold. The beach did not have trees, although we walked past some palm trees to get there, sand instead of sun sparkles unfolded the sun.

Realities are all around us. They are in all aspects of life. Hungry – full, male – female, happy – sad, dark – light. Dualities are necessary for us to appreciate the opposite. Because we experience sorrow we can truest appreciate joy. If we always had joy in our life it would be like the air we breath, we would take it for granted.

Whatever we always have we take for granted and it’s specialness wears off. For example – when I went to India we wanted to see a yak – well it wasn’t long when we were seeing yaks on the street and we stopped pointing them out to each other. They were everywhere. Then we wanted to see a monkey. We traveled to an area where the monkeys where plentiful and we would see them in groups in the trees and on top of the buildings. Again, we got used to seeing them. Our brains have a wonderful adaptive nature. We grow accustomed to the world around us. If those things we really enjoy became a constant they would stop being special, like the yak and the monkeys. We need to occasionally have a lack of yaks and monkeys to fully see them through those childlike lenses of awe. This is the purpose of duality. This is the reason why sometimes we must suffer and go without, so that we have an appreciation of the wonders in our life.

What dualities have you noticed in your life? Love and hate? Have and have not? Fact and fiction? I recent competed in a “tall tails” contest in my Toastmasters club. Fabrication does not come natural to me but it was fun to take a hand at it and now I have that to contrast with the factual speeches I give. It was very free to tell a tall tail even though my inner self wanted to keep correcting the information.

Notice the dualities my friends. Wishing you a life of abundance and joy and just enough duality to appreciate it.