Mindfulness as a Way to Heal

I am having a hungry day. Do you have days like that too? Do you find yourself having days when you just can’t seem to get enough food in you to feel full? When days like this happen to me, I often wonder what it is that I am really feeling. There is obviously some sort of emptiness that cannot seem to be filled or some corner of my mind looking for distraction.

I have eat an ample amount of healthy and nutritious food today. I have kept my promise to myself to maintain my intermittent fasting. I have even felt tempted to drink alcohol or diet soda over this weekend, but stayed true to my healthy initiates. I even manage to get in 10,000 plus steps today and yesterday. I have not been complaint free. As the sun dips below the horizon and the stars start to blink into being, I am sipping a hot tea to stave off my hunger pains. Why is there this persistent need to eat today? Maybe I am hungrier because I walked the 10,000 steps and burned more calories? Perhaps as I sit alone in silence, watching the lights across the marina, I am board. These are both very valid explanations as to why I might be feeling the need to nibble on this and that.

There is also another possible explanation. I am just not good at quiet. I am extremely good at busyness. When I am being productive my mind is distracted. When I am sitting, quietly, it allows my past emotions and experiences to creep into the corners of my mind. I want to eat, drink, do something so that I do not have to acknowledge these uncomfortable things tickling my consciousness; as they slip and slide though the cobwebby recesses of my mind. Just dealing with them would make them go away and not seem so frightening anymore, but still my protective coping mechanisms say not today! Their time is coming though. They cannot creep through the shadows of my mind forever. I will not allow them to derail all the progress I am and have been making. Adventure Sister, Emy and I are planning our own private ‘silent’ retreat.

In the silence of 48 hours, which we are gifted ourselves, there will be no place for them to hide. The ability to run (as a distraction), to have to do this or that, will not be possible. I imagine there will be some very troublesome moments in the midst of this period of silence. I can guess that I will have a couple of very hungry days. I foresee growth coming to me though this; yet I know it will not all be easy. I know that much of it will feel very uncomfortable. I will just chalk it up to growing pains as I can feel my Spirit craving this experience. It just feels so right. When I come out on the other side, will I be markedly different? Probably not but I will be healthier!

These cravings and distractions seem to wave from the depths of me. They want to be noticed yet the protective part of myself is trying to keep them hidden away, like skeletons in the closets of my mind. Through silence and mindfulness, I will allow them to come into the light, because skeletons do not seem so frightening there.

Thank you for reading my blog today. I love you. May you find the time and space to let those past hurts come to the surface and move on, as if by magic.

*Photo taken in Sanford, FL at the marina.

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You Are Complete, You Are Whole

“I am complete; the Universe exists within me”. This was the centering thought in a meditation I recently did; put out by Deepak Chopra. What a profound statement. “I am complete” is profound in and of itself but adding; “The Universe exists within in me”, causes it takes on a much deeper meaning. Thinking about this and taking it into our consciousness, can have a profound effect of how we feel about ourselves and how we interact with others. For if this is true of us, then it is also true of all others. Let’s look at this bit by bit.

I am complete –This is another way of saying; “I am enough”. It is a beautiful sentiment. How much time do we spend judging ourselves and feeling like we are not worthy or not enough. Just acknowledging that we are complete can start you to feel things shift within. You may not even believe it is true at first but slowly, if you keep reminding yourself, you can start to see how you really are complete. You are worthy. You are enough. You do not have to strive to be better. You do not have to feel like a failure. You are complete. Your journey through this life is not over and you most likely will have many more experiences. You may even be actively working on self improvement. All of this does not change the fact that you are complete. You are beautiful. You are whole.

The Universe exists within me – This part, to the centering thought, is also quite profound. I use the word Universe synonymously with God. So to me, this means that God lives within me. Much like the greeting ‘Namaste’ which has many translations, but the one I hear the most is, “The Divine in me recognizes the Divine in you”. This greeting acknowledges that God lives in all of us. The Kundalini Yoga tradition I follow uses the Mantra; “Sat Nam”, which means “I am truth”. If God lives within me how can I be anything but truth. In the Bible 1 Corinthians 3:16 says; “Do you not know that you are a temple of God and that the Spirit of God dwells in you?” It is commonly accepted in India what we are God. God is within us all, connecting us all.

If this is true for you then it is also true for others. So if you are complete, then others are also complete. It doesn’t matter who they are or where they are on their soul’s journey. They are complete. The doctor, homeless person, college student, veteran, or anyone else you can think of; they are all complete. They are whole. They are worthy. They are enough. We do not need to judge them. We can hold the space for them to have the experience they came here to have and accept them as is. It is not our job to fix them. The Universe lives within them as well. They are a bit of the God consciousness. We are all connected in this way. We are all Divine. We are all perfect because of that Divine light which we hold within us.

When you start to judge another person, remember that they are complete and the Universe exists within them. When you start to judge yourself, remember that you are complete and that the Universe exists within you also. Be patient with yourself and others. Be kind to yourself and others. Share love with all you meet.

Thank you for reading my blog today. I love you! May you understand your Divine and complete nature, as if by magic.

*Photo taken in the mountains in Oregon.

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Was It Worth It For the Story?

Have you ever had something happen to you that was not great but, in the end, became such a story with friends that it took on a life of its own? It became legendary? My husband and I had one such thing happen to us this last Spring. It has since made for a great story and taken on much of a life of its own among our friends. Although it was bad, a violation of our property and sense of safety, I am going to say it may have been worth it for the story. Not saying that I would every want it to happen again.

It started on Mother’s Day. We had decided to go to the zoo to celebrate the day and spend time together. A picnic lunch had been planned and prepared. We were packing up the car. My husband was on his second trip to the car with supplies when he stopped. “Whoa, whoa, whoa!”, he exclaimed. I was completely focused on getting us on the way to zoo and making sure we had everything and had noticed nothing different.

“What?”, I asked him.

“Someone stole our fire pit!”.

I looked at the patio we had finished the previous summer. Our lawn furniture was there but the table, with a built in propane burning fire pit in the center, was gone. It was a sunny Sunday morning. He swore it had been there on his first trip out to the car 20 minutes earlier. Someone (likely 2 people, because of its size and weight) had pulled up and made off with our fireplace table and propane tank in broad daylight. While we were up and moving around and even outside.

The feeling of violation was horrible. Wondering what else might be taken in the future was terrible. That this could or would happen was shocking. Marty bought cables and locks and started chaining everything down. We did replace the fire pit and it is chained up now. More than our fire pit, they stole our sense of safety and security. In the end we were grateful no one was hurt. It was just a thing after all.

I posted the story on social media. I asked that everyone pray or send intentions that the perpetrators life will improve, in such a way, that acts like these we no longer seem necessary for them. I joked that someone’s mother got a very nice Mother’s Day gift.

The story has since taken on a life of its own. Our friends often mention it. They will make jokes about it, post picture of themselves in our backyard when we are not home, and act surprised when they stop by and its replacement is still there. The missing fire pit has cause much amusement for many people. I am in no way condoning theft. I would not want this to happen to us (or anyone) ever again. Sometimes (though) you have to laugh or else you cry. The amusement and jokes that have since come out of this have; maybe, just maybe, made it worth it for the story.

Try and find the good or at least the amusing, in all things, as if by magic. I love you! Thanks for reading my blog.

*Picture was take in our front yard.

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It’s Not Much… But It Is

A friend gave me a gift recently. She handed me the pretty wrapped package and said; “It’s not much but…” I witness people doing this all the time. It’s like they feel embarrassed that there is not a 50 foot yacht wrapped up behind that red and white package.

The gift was very much. It was her communication to me that she loves me. It was her way of wishing me well in this festive time of year. Her gift was well thought out and something that is truly useful and meaningful to me. She took the time to think about me and choose a gift that I would definitely love. She took the time to shop for something special for me. She spent her money, which takes time to earn, to buy something for me. Her gift was very much.

Time is something many of us feel short on. It seems like it just flies by and we end up needing more hours in the day then we have. When someone spends that precious commodity to give us a nice gift, it is very much! There are so many people that touch our lives that we cannot possible give them all gifts. I feel so blessed and special when singled out as someone, important enough, to add to their Christmas list.

When you give gifts to others, whether it is this holiday season or anytime during the year. There is no need to say; “It is not much”, to the receiver. Because to them, it is much. It is a communication of; “I care about you”, “You matter to me”, “Thank you for your friendship”, and so much more.

I am so grateful for this friend. I love her. She did not need to give me a gift to let me know she cares but I will think of her fondly every time I use her gift. Friends are such a blessing. That is the real gift for me, to be her friend.

Thank you for reading my blog today. I love you! May you have kind and loving friends in your life, that let you know you matter, as if by magic.

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What Does This Time of Year Mean To You?

During this time of year, between Thanksgiving and the New Year, there are many different holidays that are celebrated depending on your faith or your family heritage. What does this time of year mean to you? Do you like it or does it make you feel stressed out? Do you have a strong sense of community or do you feel more alone than the rest of the year? Does it bring back fond childhood memories or does it bring feelings of sorrow and loss? I think over the years I have felt all of these various emotions at sometime or another during December.

If you go way back before the birth of Christianity; people celebrated holidays according to what they called the wheel of the year. Winter Solstice, which happens on approximately December 21st, was a celebration of the light returning. The days getting longer again. The wheel of the year was based on the farming year. This time of year was considered a time for rest and reflection. It was not a time to start new things, but rather a time to evaluate how the last year went and what to do differently when the Spring Equinox rolled around again and it was time to start preparing to plant the crops. That being said, many of our ancestors used this as a time to go inward. It is in such contrast to the busy hustle and bustle of the holiday season of today. For many this is the bushiest time of the year. Many people pick up seasonal jobs to pay for the gifts they have to buy. Holiday parties and get-togethers fill up all of your free time. There is shopping and baking to be done. Lists to make and check twice. Children are in holiday plays or other performances. It is all very busy and much more focused on community and others, rather than that inward journey.

Please be aware that if you are feeling like it is all too much, this just might be the ancestral roots within you. They may be calling to you to say; “shhhh, just be quiet for a bit now”. They may be asking that you rest, gather your strength, and prepare for the spring. Having clear communication with others, when it gets to much, can help you set boundaries for yourself around this. Have a dialog to clearly express what you need during this busy season. Perhaps you want to delay that get-together until after the first of the year, when your calendar is open. Maybe it is setting limits on gift giving or, as I said on a friends post, “giving the gift of not having to exchange gifts” with someone. You are not alone. Many people are feeling the stress and expectations this season places upon us. My hope for you is that with clear communication and firm boundaries, some of the stress of the holiday season can subside and you can return to reflecting on what does this season really mean to you. How do you best want to enjoy this season? There is much beauty in this time of year. Find the peace to be able to enjoy it.

Thank you for reading my blog today. I love you! May the peace of this holiday season infuse you to the core, as if by magic.

*Photo was taken in our back yard

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Financial Wellness: An Interesting Side Effect We Discovered

My husband and I recently decided to work on our financial wellness. You may be thinking that finances have nothing to do with your overall wellness, but I strongly disagree. Our finances have a profound affect on us. They allow us to pay for important healthcare; such as acupuncture, massage, or even a visit to the doctor. Having adequate resources allows us to buy healthy and nutritious food. Money even supports some self care activities such as going on a retreat, vacations, or yoga classes. Even without all the things that having some coin in our pockets can do for us, there is the stress that not having enough cash causes. When the bills seem to out number your income or creditors all calling, the stress level can get out of control fast. High stress levels are not good for us. They can cause anxiety, depression, high blood pressure and other illnesses including unhealthy weight problems. Gaining control of your funds is an important step to your overall wellness.

As my husband and I set out on our journey to financial wellness, we first had to get on the same page. We are grateful for the book, Total Money Makeover; by Dave Ramsey. Dave doesn’t believe in manifestation or the Law of Attraction. Interestingly, I feel it was my focus on manifesting financial abundance, that caused the Universe to bring Dave and his books to my attention. I am happy to agree to disagree with Dave on this point. Total Money Makeover inspired Marty and I to get serious about our finances and we started working on the steps Dave laid out in his book.

All of this was a new to me. I have done spreadsheets for bills and payments due but never made a plan for how to spend the rest of the money. It just never seemed like there was enough of it to worry about. However, not worrying about how to spend the rest caused overspending. This just made matters worse and financial stress higher. We downloaded the app, that has been developed to support Dave’s principles. It is called Every Dollar. Dave wants you to give every dollar coming into your household a home so you know where every dollar is spent. When we initially logged our October spending, we were shocked to see some of the ways that money was escaping from our pockets. There were a lot of little things we were spending money on that, quite frankly, were a waste. Money was dribbling away from us in little insidious ways. It was not big purchases that were doing damage to our bottom line. It was the few dollar here and a couple of bucks there.

Next, we developed a November budget and set forth to follow it as close as possible. It was the first time either of us had ever really budgeted that tightly. There were things that came up that we had to adjust another spot in the budget to expense them from. Everything needed to add up to zero at the end. There were a couple places where we placed too much money and a couple others where we did not plan enough. In the end, we made it through our first month of budgeting. When we talked about how we felt during this first month of budgeting, we both agreed that we felt more in control of our finances and less stressed. The interesting side effect was, when we got to the end of the month and the next payday, we had some money leftover. It seems crazy but true. Somehow being on a budget, giving everything a home and watching where things were going; not only gave us the feeling of having more money but actually more money.

I am very grateful that my husband is the type of man who is willing to walk this process with me. It is truly a team effort. If you decide to start on a road of finance wellness, I wish you every success. That are many money gurus out there. Maybe Dave is right for you or maybe it is someone else whose process just seems to make sense and be the right tool you need to feel financial well.

Thank you for reading my blog today. I love you! I wish you a lifetime of finding the right financial tools for your personnel wellness, as if by magic. Just as mine came to me.

*Photo taken in Rome, Italy

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Silliness is Always a Good Idea: 7+ Ways I Have Added it to My Life

Do you like to be silly? It can feel very vulnerable to be playful and silly but it can also feed your soul and support your inner child. Let’s face it, there is a little kid hidden deep inside all of us. Here are some examples of how I have added some more play to my life. Trust me, even if it feels awkward at first, before long you will be laughing and not giving a darn what others think when they see you being goofy.

1. A friend and I recently drove up Mt Baker in Washington State. Along the way there was a big silhouette of Sasquatch. I excitedly ran up to him to shake his hand. My friend was not there to judge me but did manage to grab a shot for Facebook. Perhaps the cars driving by thought my behavior was a bit odd, but what they think of me does not impact me in the least. It was fun and we had some much needed laughs.

2. I invited a friend over for supper and decided to make it a theme meal. We had an inner child party; complete with sticky alien party favors, corndogs, and dreamsickles for dessert. It was a fun way to spend time with a friend while letting our inner children play and feel nourished.

3. Yet another friend and I went to a theme park together. It was busy time of year, when there seemed to be more work than hours in the day. There were big tubes for the kids to crawl through, on, and over. We got down on our hands and knees and crawled around in the play area like children; giggling and released a lot of the stress that had built up.

4. We try to have a family dinner once a week. For a recent family dinner we decided to have a tea party, complete with crustless sandwiches and fancy china. The kids had a great time but so did the three grown men around the table. They sipped their tea, held their pinky out, and laughed big belly laughs. They were a great example to the teenaged boy and younger children at the table that it is okay to be vulnerable and yourself.

5. When going for a walk, if I happen across a child chalk hopscotch game on the side walk, I cannot pass by with out hop, skipping, and jumping my way through it. It’s just plain and simple, feels great to be a kid at heart.

6. When my kids were teenagers we lived in a small rural community. There was not a lot to do. One night we just decided to crank up the music and dance the night away in the basement. Dance is a wonderful way to release pent up energy and be as silly as you want too. Those around you may get a good laugh and you will have some disco disco fun!

7. When Emy and I go the the BWCA, we bring kid’s blowup tubes. We push them down around our middles like pink and blue tutus and float in the clean cool lakes. We chat and play in the water like carefree little girls. It feels great to be so free for a little while.

The amount of silliness you can allow into your life is only hampered by your imagination and bravery. Play Clue by candle light, wear something fun like a big floppy hat, pop silly poses with statues, go to the park and swing as high as you dare, finger paint, or anything else your imagination suggests. It is a great way to have fun, release stress, and get some great big belly laughs going.

Thank you for reading my blog today. I love you! May your life be filled with laughter, as if by magic!

*photo was taken at our kitchen table

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Do You Feel the Call

I can feel the creativity flowing within me. It wants to come out but not in the way it has in the past. This is not about just about writing a blog or creating a meme. This is about creating something that will live on beyond me. Something that will help people on a much bigger scale than my blogs currently can. Maybe it will even help me at a deeper level. After all, the wheel of the year has turned to the place where the crops are harvested and the seeds lay dormant under the surface. Just waiting for the time when their potential can be realized and rise again into the sun. This is how I feel now.

I want to create a class or retreat. I want to help others do their internal work. I feel it may be time for me to do this again as well. I was recently reading a book about someone who attended a silent retreat and that sounded interesting and growth inducing to me. There is something within me that has me saying that I should create one of my own. Am I destined to do it alone or am I going to offer it on a larger level? I feel called to offer classes and retreats but how does that work within my world? How does that work with my travel. Perhaps offering something online? Is it possible for me to do more, be more, help more?

What types of stirrings do you feel in your soul? Are you called to create something right now? Do you feel more inclined to journal, paint, meditate, teach, or do some other type of creative endeavor? Am I alone in this calling (deep in my soul) right now or are other light workers feeling this call as well? I am always drawn to work collaboratively with groups, but at this spot on the wheel of the year, is the time right for that?

It is the right time to go inside, both physically and mentally; to feel deeply and learn more about yourself. It is a great time to do healing work. It is wonderful time to feel your pain so that it can be released with the new life that will arrive in the spring. Trust what you are feeling now. Trust what is bubbling up inside you. Follow your intuition that pulls deep in your gut and create!

Thank you for reading my blog today. I love you! May you be able to follow the pull you feel inside of you, as if by magic.

*Photo was taken in Indianapolis, IN

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Negotiations With Myself; 10 Tactics to Stay the Course

It seems like the hardest negotiations I have to have are with myself. This realization came tonight while I was having a conversation with Adventure Sister, Emy. We are great at talking ourselves out of doing things, but talking ourselves into doing things is a whole nother story. What can we do to be successful in negotiations with ourselves?

I am a world champion justifier. If you are not good at justifying something let me take a swing at it. Maybe this gift is a part of my Susie Sunshine Personality, where I can find the good in anything. But like the grinch, it doesn’t matter if this is because my shoes are too tight or my head is not screwed on just right. Being able to justify my way out of everything down not help me embrace healthy habits. Right now I am busy justifying that I don’t need to get my 10,000 steps a day because it is cold outside.

I have negotiated things with others through out my life. Many of these negotiations have been quite successful. How can I use these techniques to negotiate healthy habits with myself?

1. Be firm and set the expectations. That inner couch potato will want to have it their own way. Having a firm line and setting the expectation with yourself will help when your mind starts making up excuses.

2. Have a prepared response. Since we are talking about negotiations with yourself, you probably have a pretty good idea what excuses you will come up with. Be prepared with reasons why these excuses are just not good enough to set your healthy habits aside

3. Keep the goal in mind. Having a clear picture of where you are heading makes it easier to stay the course. This is true no matter if the goal is weight, career, financial, romantic, or whatever.

4. Stay excited! Having a goal can be very exciting, especially when you see progress. Celebrate small successes along the way to help keep the excitement flowing.

5. Ask for a little bit more time. Your inner critic may try and tell you this isn’t working or that you aren’t benefitting from this initiative. Convince that inner critic to keep trying, just a little bit longer. A break through may be just around the corner.

6. Remind yourself that you are worth it. This is such an epidemic of people not feeling worthy. Remind yourself your are worthy have having what you are working toward. You are good enough, you are strong enough, and you deserve success.

7. Ask yourself for advise. When you start hearing the we don’t have to do this anymore voice in your head ask it what it needs to keep going. Sometime just acknowledging the voice will be enough to help you push on. Other times a little inner dialog about what inspiration is needed will give you the power to get over the hump.

8. Use logic. Remind yourself of all the good reasons why sticking with this will help you in the long run

9. Be aware of your emotions. Emotions can pop up when we least expect them. Especially when we are working toward a seemingly difficult goal. (Most goals are achievable with persistence). When those emotions pop up, acknowledge them. Do not try to minimize them. Once you have acknowledged them, allow them to move through you. Release them, do not hold onto them.

10. Push past objections. Sometimes there is no convincing the inner Negative Nelly. Sometimes you will just have to ignore that part of yourself and just keep going. You can do it!

Good luck winning those negotiations with yourself. I believe in you! You can achieve your goals and live the life of your dreams. Keep going.

Thank you for reading my blog today. I love you! May you effortlessly continue to move in the direction of you dreams, as if by magic.

*Photo was taken in Zagreb, Croatia

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Twin Flame Relationships

Have you ever heard of the idea of a Twin Flame? Many people romanticize this concept but there really is more ‘pain’ than ‘romance’ in most Twin flame experiences. It is a very different experience from meeting your soulmate.

Twin Flames; is the concept that your soul is split in two to go into this earthly plane to have very different experiences. From my understanding; Twin Flames are typically opposites in almost every way. (Opposite sex, passions, personality, demeanor, spirituality, politics, etc.) Although many people may meet their Twin Flame, very few of these relationships are successful. The differences are just too great. It brings to mind the song from the Disney Movie, Little Mermaid; “Poor Unfortunate Souls.” When this relationship is successful, it is likely a very old soul that has worked through many experiences in countless lifetimes.

Recently, I have seen several articles about relationships between Empaths and Narcissists. It struck me that the Narcissist is the anti-empath. They cannot empathize with others. Perhaps these are actually Twin Flame relationships. Twin Flames feel like Karmic relationships. Have you ever had a friend who is drawn to someone so opposite and bad for them, that it just doesn’t make any sense, but you can’t talk them into staying away? This very well maybe a Twin Flame. Despite all the pain, they go back again and again. They can even verbalize how bad the other is for them, but like a moth to the flame, they can’t stay away.

Because Twin Flames are a split of one soul, there is a feeling of completeness and of home that comes when the two are together. It makes it that much harder for them to breakaway from each other to live a healthier more balanced life.

Relationships are one of the biggest teachers we experience in this life, especially romantic ones. Nothing will put your “stuff” in your face, like a romantic relationship. Having a romantic relationship with a Twin Flame can feel predestine and still be the most painful thing you experience. There can be lots to learn and much growth, but it will likely take just as much healing, personal work, and self discovery to recover after the relationship.

So what are your thoughts? Do you agree with me that the Narcissists and the Empaths are drawn together because they are Twin Flames? Have you had a relationship with your Twin Flame? What was your experience like?

Thank you for reading my blog today. I love you! May your life be filled with happy and healthy relationships, as if by magic.

*The featured photo on this blog was taken on The Little Mermaid Ride in Disney’s Magic Kingdom, Orlando FL.

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