I Promise to Myself

There is so much going on in the world around us. Things that we judge to be good and things that we judge to be bad. We have no control over it. This is very stressful. Feels like we are always waiting for the other shoe to drop. I choose not to focus on all that is going on “out there”. I am choosing to put my focus on what I can control, me. I can control that I get out of bed and meditate, everyday. I can control that I get out there and go for a run, at least 3 days a week. I can control that I get out into to nature multiple times a week, which lifts my spirit and improves my health. These are the promises I make to myself.

My friend and Adventure sister, Emy, introduced me, a couple years ago, to a song. The song is I Am the Fire by Halestorm. It is very motivational. I have it in my running playlist, because it reminds me that my commitment to run is a promise that I made to myself. It is not for anyone else. It is just for me. If I don’t go run in the morning, it does not hurt anyone else. I would be letting myself down. It is with that in mind that I slip into my running shoes and head out the door at least 3 days every week.

In the past when I made promises to myself it was easy to step away from them, because I wasn’t letting anyone else down. When in reality I was letting the most important person down, myself. The promises we make to ourself deserve the same importance as the promises we make to others. We deserve the same commitment and devotion we show others. So how do we break through the barriers that may try to hold us back?

For me is a no negotiation policy. I just know that Monday, Wednesday, and Friday are running days. Meditation happens every morning. There is no option for later. In the past I always embraced flexibility in my self care practices, but I found that for me, that led to excuse making and procrastination. Once you procrastinate late enough into the day, it is easy to move it to the next day, until it doesn’t happen.

I don’t have all the answers. I can’t tell you what may work for you. All I know is what has helped me. This blog is really just me sharing my rambling thoughts, with the hope that someone will find some inspiration or a little bit of helpful information that I have learned along my journey.

I love you! Thank you for reading my blog today. May you make and keep promises to yourself. You are worth it! May you also remember, it is okay to be a work in progress.

2020: The Year of Health

I may sound cliche to start the new year focused on health and it certainly is not new for me, but it is different this time. Let me tell you why.

In the past my focus was to loose weight. I would make a New Year’s resolution to exercise and get thin but the motivation was really vanity. I didn’t understand how powerful mind, body and spirit wellness was back then. The resolution would last 2, maybe 3 months and then I would fade back into my old patterns of behavior. Today I no longer make resolutions; instead I make a list of new year’s manifestations. These manifestation can be anything I want to come into my life in the new year. I decided 2020 would be a year of health.

My year of health manifestation list has a lofty number of health related items I want to enhance my life. They are mind, body, and spirit related, for one cannot successfully be well without balance in all these areas.

It is day 4 in my year of health and I already feel a shift in my mood. I find myself making healthy decisions and I keep slowly incorporating items to bring about overall wellness.

On Jan 1st, I started the day hungover from a New Year’s Eve party I attended. I find this very embarrassing to admit to. So, my first healthy initiatives were to give up alcohol and sugar. Next I went back to intermittent fasting. This is an eating strategy that limits the time you can eat during the day. It has many health benefits but my primary use of it is weight loss. I have gained about 30 pounds in the last 4 years and it is affecting my energy level and ability to do things. Losing weight is not about vanity for me this time. It is about being comfortable hiking, having the energy to kayak and reclaiming my connection with my body as a divine being.

Then I decided to start tracking what I eat. This is about mindfulness. So now I know what I am putting into my body and why. I am using the “My Fitness Pal” app to do so; although there are so many apps that can help you with it. I have anemia, so it helps me track my iron intake, something that is important for me as a pescatarian. I also find that tracking what I eat, makes me less likely to do the mindless noshing that can occur when I am bored.

Yesterday I decided to start drinking 1/2 my body weight in ounces of water. I feel this is helping purify my body from all the toxic things I have put into her in the past. Also, yesterday I recommitted to moving my body. Getting at least 10,000 steps a day. I even started running a little again. I plan to improve my fitness condition in order to participate in 5K events. I really enjoyed these in the past. My daughter, Liz, and I have also done a couple 1/2 marathons together and we are toying with the idea of committing to do another one of these.

Today I am starting on my commitment of “52 Hikes” during 2020. I have seen others make a commitment to this in the past, but never got on board because of the frozen tundra where I live. I know I feel better when I get outside and be “in” nature, so this is another part of the mind and spirit commitment for me.

My husband and I continue our pursuit towards financial wellness. Yoga and meditation are on my list of items to incorporate. I find that adding (a little) something new daily is helping me stay motivated and not feel overwhelmed. I’m just slowly incorporating, the items I want, into my year of wellness.

I know it is only day 4 but I already feel clearer and more upbeat. I am more connected with my body and the aches and pains are starting to subside. I have lost 4 pounds and even reclaimed my right to be a runner.

Would you like to join me on my journey into the year of health?

Come along! It won’t always be easy but it will be totally worth it!

I love you! May your year bring you every happiness.

A 40 Day Practice

Kundalini Yogis love their multi-day practices. Some commit to a 40 day practice but others commit to 90, 120, or even 1000 days. 1000 days equals 2.7 years and if you miss a single day of practice, you have to start over at day 1. Wow, what a great motivator to not miss a day! Especially once you get a ways into it. When I did my teacher training in Kundalini Yoga, I did a 40 day practice. That was a number of years ago and I do not remember a lot about it; other than really committing to myself seemed to be the hardest part. I now feel compelled to again do another 40 day practice.

During our retreat we did a very motivational YouTube video of Nahbi Kriya. I had already been feeling drawn to start a 40 day practice of this yoga set, so when we did it together that Friday night on the boat, I knew I had to keep going. Emy and I decided we’d both commit to a 40 day practice. We text each other each day as we check off completing our practice for the day. Tonight I completed day #12 and that puts me a little over 1/4 of the way to the finish line. According to 3HO, a 40 day practice, “Will break any negative habits that block you from the expansion possible through the kriya or mantra”.

There are days that seem more difficult and some days when it takes every ounce of my strength to begin again. The thought of having to start over at day 1 again though, gets me onto my mat and fulfilling my commitment to myself. I have learned some things along the way already, and one is that I am a driven person. I am not good at sitting and resting. I always want to get to the goal as quickly as possible. As I reflect on the 40 day commitment, I realize that I can’t rush this. 40 days is 40 days! I can’t do it 2 or 3 times today to get to the goal sooner. I have to commit to myself and complete each day and then patiently wait for the arrival of the next day.

Another thing I have learned, along the way, is about my nature to attempt to be perfect. My form is not always going to be perfect. Some days my practice is going to be better than others. Some days I will have time to do the full 45 minute versos and other mornings where I am needing to get to the airport; so the 25 minute version may just have to do. I have to trust that adjusting the practice to fit my life, while still maintaining the commitment to myself, is okay. I know that even if today’s best is not the same as my personal best or someone else best, that it is still okay.

Tonight’s practice was done surrounded by family. The grandchildren and a couple of the adults joined me. It was not as peaceful and meditative as it usually is when I perform it in my hotel room; with the toddler was bopping around from person to person, but tonight it was filled with joyous energy and love. Tonight I learned that I can keep commitments to myself even while spending time with those I love.

What commitments would you like to make to yourself? How would you see this taking place in your life? What do you think you might learn from it?

Thank you for reading my blog today. I love you! May your life be filled with fulfilled commitments to yourself, as if by magic.

*Photo was taken on New Smyrna Beach

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Week 6 check in – Daily Meditation Adventure

If you have not already joined our 90 day meditation adventure, I hope you will still do so. Here is how week number six went for me.

What I have learned:Because of the struggles I have had with calming my monkey mind to meditate, I have gone back to what I know best. I went back to Kundalini Yoga Meditation. This has been much more effective for me. I more easily get into a calm state. I have learned that when I feel anxious and have a lot on my plate, this is the meditation that works best for me. I think because it includes mantra and often movement. It gives the monkey mind something to focus on to keep it present and not off trying to plan the rest of my life.

Experiences during the week:I found a nice deep sense of calm in the midst of the meditation. During one, I had visions of color swirling and clouds moving. This morning, I was feeling quite anxious. I needed to get my blog written, coordinate with family at home, find time to meditate and get to work on time. I was working feverishly to get it all done. Then I stopped and did my meditation. I chose one with the mantra “Ra Ma Da Sa Sa Say So Hung”. It had a very calming affect on me and allowed me to see that it will all get done in Divine Timing. This is a very healing mantra and pulls the energies of the Sun, Moon, Earth, and Universe into our bodies. It can be interpreted to mean “God is within me”. It is a nice way to find some morning calm and let some of the anxiety of everything on the “to do” list go.

My weight: I forgot to weigh on Monday morning and I am in Nashville this week so the update on my weight will have to wait till next week. I do feel as if I am swollen, perhaps from the heat and humidity. My rings are tight on my fingers.

How I feel: My back pain is resolved. I found that the Kundalini Yoga Meditation was very helpful in controlling my back pain.Acupuncture resolved it totally. I feel a sense of calm after my Kundalini meditations that is not a typical part of my day. I feel more centered.

How it is affecting my life:

“You should sit in meditation for twenty minutes every day — unless you’re too busy. Then you should sit for an hour.” -Zen proverb.

I have struggled to get once a day meditation in; so now I am working to increase it to twice a day meditation. This has helped me be more successful in making sure I get it in at least once a day. I find when I am home with family it is harder to make time for myself and I “poo poo” the importance of it. I need to recommit to me. I need to understand that it is not selfish for me to take 15 – 20 minutes twice a day to find my own inner calm. It allows me to be better with the world around me.

I would love to hear your experiences with this. I hope you are having a more profound lift with shifting experiences. If you are snuggling a bit, like I am, it’s ok! Don’t give up! We’ll get there!

Thank you for reading my blog today. I wish you a lifetime of finding the calm amidst the storm.

Previous meditation blogs by the Adventure Sisters: Join Us on This Adventure, Meditate the weight away?, 9 ways to improve meditation, Meditation contemplations, There’s an App for That: A review of meditation Apps, 7 Common Meditation Myths, 11 Types of Meditation

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